Learning to Encourage Yourself in the Lord
In moments of despair, our response to God—whether we cling to bitterness or draw strength from Christ—determines the outcome of our lives.
In 1 Samuel, there’s a fascinating account of King Saul and David in what was probably the worst crisis of their lifetime. These two men of God were both overwhelmed, but they reacted in completely different ways. It is very similar to how many of us react when we face difficult times. Often, we are tempted to resign ourselves to despair. King Saul found it impossible to encourage himself in his crisis. He couldn’t find comfort from any source: not from himself, not from man, not from God. His and David’s responses are full of lessons for us today.
The Cost of Bitterness
When the Philistine army marched toward Israel, Saul’s scouts brought a frightful report. Scripture says, “When Saul saw the army of the Philistines, he was afraid, and his heart trembled greatly” (1 Samuel 28:5, NKJV). This is the same man who was anointed and chosen by God and counseled by the great prophet Samuel. He was once a fearless warrior, but in that moment, he was trembling with great fear. He had no purpose or direction in his life. What turned this mighty warrior into a coward? Saul had allowed a seed of envy, anger, and jealousy to take root in his heart.
The Bible describes the moment this seed took root. It says, “So the women sang as they danced, and said: ‘Saul has slain his thousands, and David his ten thousands.’ Then Saul was very angry, and the saying displeased him; and he said, ‘They have ascribed to David ten thousands, and to me they have ascribed only thousands. Now what more can he have but the kingdom?’ So Saul eyed David from that day forward” (1 Samuel 18:7-9). Scripture says, “The next day an evil spirit from God came forcefully on Saul” (1 Samuel 18:10, NIV). This marked the beginning of Saul’s downward spiral. When David came in to play his harp, Saul had a spear in his hand and said, “I will pin David to the wall!” (1 Samuel 18:11). Saul was filled with a spirit of revenge against David.
Do you hold a grudge against someone? Perhaps your boss, a coworker, a family member, or someone else has hurt you. If you allow a spirit of envy to take root, that seed is planted, and it begins to grow in you. If it is not cast out, it will become an evil obsession. The Bible says, “For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work” (James 3:16, KJV).
If you become obsessed with envy or bitterness like Saul, it begins to infect everybody in your circle, and you become consumed by it. What is in your heart comes out of your mouth as gossip and a complaining spirit. It is all you talk about. You mistrust everyone and start to think everyone is against you.
We see this mistrust in Saul’s life. He thought everyone was against him, including his son, Jonathan. Now Jonathan was a godly man who loved his father. Yet “Saul’s anger was aroused against Jonathan, and he said to him, ‘You son of a perverse, rebellious woman!’” (1 Samuel 20:30). Saul cursed his son, saying, “You’ve turned against me. You’ve chosen David above me.” A spirit of jealousy, rage, and murder took over him.
The Bible says, “Whoever hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him” (1 John 3:15). If you have a single root of bitterness, a single thought of revenge, it will destroy you. It brings with it a spirit of murder. Today, though we may not murder, the murder in our hearts may manifest itself through slander and gossip. If we feel mistreated, we complain that no one understands us.
Saul’s obsession with appearances and his bitter envy had reduced him to a man who had no place to turn for comfort. “When Saul inquired of the Lord, the Lord did not answer him, either by dreams or by Urim or by the prophets” (1 Samuel 28:6). Saul couldn’t sleep, and he went through the rooms of his house screaming his rage. He tried to pray, but he couldn’t. Saul had no one to turn to: no priest, no prophet, not even his son, Jonathan. There was no place to go.
When you walk the same path, you’re on your own. Where do you go when you keep this sin in you? Who do you turn to? No one who is a good Holy Ghost counselor will have a word for you because your heart is hard. There is only one way out, and that is to acknowledge your sin and cry out, “God, I have this sin in my life. Pluck it by its roots!”
Saul’s life ended tragically in suicide. The Bible says, “…therefore Saul took a sword and fell on it” (1 Samuel 31:4). The night before, he consorted with a witch, and an apparition of Samuel told Saul that he and his sons would die the next day (see 1 Samuel 28). Why? Because, through bitterness, Saul had given himself over to the devil and his accusations. The one mission the devil had was to kill Saul. The devil is out to kill and destroy through envy, strife, and bitterness.
I have been in rooms visiting sick people who are dying, and they are full of bitterness. You can feel their despair and watch them go into eternity in a rage. It is spiritual suicide. I pray that those who hold on to this bitterness will be delivered. I pray that the fear of the holy God will grip their heart. Scripture says, “In mercy and truth atonement is provided for iniquity; and by the fear of the Lord one departs from evil” (Proverbs 16:6).
Our Hope in Despair
Now, David reacted very differently to his worst crisis. While Saul was consorting with the witch, David was on his way home to Ziklag with 600 of his men. He had been chased by Saul and had joined King Achish and the Philistines. When the Philistine army prepared to go to battle against Saul, David said, “I’m going with you.” Achish said no for fear that in the heat of the battle, David would turn on them. So, David and his men set out on the three-day journey home. When they arrived, they saw the smoking embers of their ruined city. Their family members, their cattle, their homes—everything was destroyed. There was nothing left.
David stood in the middle of the city’s ruins. His motley army, which included many of his relatives and family members, was in a rage and full of grief. “Now David was greatly distressed, for the people spoke of stoning him, because the soul of all the people was grieved, every man for his sons and his daughters...” (1 Samuel 30:6). The people were angry and were ready to kill David.
David had every reason to despair and question God. He was anointed by Samuel the prophet. God chose him to be king in Saul’s place, but it seemed like a mockery. Israel turned him down, Saul rejected him, and even the Philistines told him to get out. His family was gone; he had no home or possessions. David stood there empty and greatly distressed.
Yet the Bible says, “...But David strengthened himself in the Lord his God” (1 Samuel 30:6). David looked at his situation, lifted his hands, and began to encourage himself in the Lord. He said, “God, you’re the one who is going to preserve me. Live or die, I am going to trust you right now!” Where did he get that inner strength? David had many failings, but in this time of crisis, he reached out to the Lord. There was nothing in himself; it was the Spirit of God in him. It was his communion with the heavenly Father that was bearing fruit.
Beloved, it pays to commune with God because you can depend on him in any crisis. You can go to your heavenly Father because he’s not a stranger to you.
How did David encourage himself? Here is the truth that will set you free. Psalm 16 is known as a miktam poem. It is the Hebrew word meaning “golden psalm.” Theologians believe David wrote this psalm while he was in despair. In the first verse, David says, “Preserve me, O God, for in you I put my trust” (Psalm 16:1). The original Hebrew says, “Guard me, oh Lord.” In other words, guard me from my enemies. I take shelter in you and put my life in your hands. In Psalm 32:7, David said, “You are my hiding place; you shall preserve me from trouble; you shall surround me with songs of deliverance.”
David didn’t turn to a prophet or someone else; he turned to the Lord. Folks, get off your phones and get alone with God. He’s the only one who will preserve you. He’s the only shelter from your storm.
“O my soul, you have said to the Lord, ‘You are my Lord, my goodness is nothing apart from you.’ As for the saints who are on the earth, ‘they are the excellent ones, in whom is all my delight’” (Psalm 16:2-3). Here, David is saying, “I don’t have to hold a grudge. I can forgive all of them because it is the right thing to do.”
The reason David could forgive is in the next verse: “Their sorrows shall be multiplied who hasten after another god…” (Psalm 16:4). In other words, he’s not going to add to their sorrow because they already have bitterness in their heart. Then he continues, “O Lord, you are the portion of my inheritance and my cup; you maintain my lot” (Psalm 16:5). David was standing in the ruins, but he knew that God was his inheritance. He says, “Lord, they can have it all. Just give me you. You are my life.”
Jesus Our Inheritance
In moments of despair, it doesn’t matter if I lose everything. For nobody can take Jesus out of my heart. My inheritance is eternity with him. In Psalm 16, David says that through the power of the Holy Ghost, not one single thought of envy, bitterness, or anger can rob our fellowship with the Lord. For those who repent and ask the Holy Ghost to pluck these things out of their lives, their reward is guidance, pleasure, and joy forevermore.
As he did with David, God will speak to you in your crisis, telling you how much he loves you. He speaks words of direction and counsel. The Lord gives you this wonderful promise that you’ll never be cast into outer darkness. Oh, the glory, the joy, and the victory of those who cast aside every root, every semblance of envy, anger, or jealousy in the name of Jesus.
Beloved, if you are blinded by this dangerous condition, the only way to break through is to say, “Search my heart, Lord.” Is there someone you are jealous of or angry at? Let the Holy Spirit deal with your heart. If you want deliverance, openly confess it to the Lord right now! He will be faithful to deliver you into a humble and trusting peace. Amen ▉
